How to Stay Strong After a Breakup
Breakups can be devastating, especially if your partner is the one to break up with you and if you were not prepared or did not see it coming. You might feel literally sick as you wonder what went wrong, and may see all your hopes and dreams for the future dashed to pieces. Because breakups can affect you so greatly, how do you stay strong?
Not allowing yourself to wallow in your misery is the first step to healing and helping you to stay strong. If you spend hour after hour crying about your ex and reliving the good times, and grieving for that future that you no longer have, this just makes the misery last even longer. You may have some things you want to talk about and work out with your girlfriends, but you never want to linger over the past or spend unnecessary amounts of time thinking about what might have been, or about what you have lost. When you feel yourself ready to spend yet another evening on the couch, crying and eating ice cream, take positive steps to move on.
How you look at your breakup will also affect your reaction. You may need to grieve for the relationship and the future you thought you had, but you also need to see this as a new opportunity for yourself. You can start over, concentrating on your own life and your own goals as an individual. You can also consider finding someone new, and thinking about those possibilities can help you to move away from the past and get over that devastating breakup.
Taking positive and proactive steps to move on with your life will also help you to stay strong after a breakup. Do not leave your entire life to chance, but make a list of goals you want to accomplish and things you want to do now that you are single again. This might include training for a marathon, taking a cooking class, buying a pottery wheel, going back to school, starting a business, or even moving out of your current apartment to something smaller. You might also want to travel or spend more time with your girlfriends and your family. Write out all these goals and make a plan for how you want to achieve them and concentrate on those goals when you feel yourself becoming upset over your breakup.
In some cases you may even need to speak to a counselor about your breakup and what Is going on in your head and your heart. A counselor can help you to work through the events leading up to the breakup and can help you to better understand how to avoid this situation in the future. This can help you to have a better outlook on relationships in general and keep you from being overly upset about your recent split.Related Stories: